"dream within a dream"

                                                           "...But a dream within a dream?"

I recently re-read a poem by Edgar Allan Poe called 'A Dream Within a Dream' and it got me thinking (again - no surprise there, haha) about the last two years and how everything has changed. How the norm of our every day lives have changed and how the old 'normal' seems so foreign and far away as it was never reality. Do you ever just sit and question whether this is what life is nowadays? Because, yeah me too.

The poem by Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favourite poems ever and one that I often go back to because of how much the words bring comfort to me and in a way also motivates me, especially when I feel lost or confused. Through this poem, Edgar Allan Poe expresses so beautifully the doubt and uncertainty that you can feel about reality and even the question that we sometimes ask ourselves 'is it just an illusion?' whenever we go through something, whether it's a happy time or even when we feel hurt about something. When either of these things happen, I feel like our natural instinct is to question whether it's true or not and Poe enforces this through the last line in the poem (also one of the best ways to end a poem in my opinion)  'a dream within a dream'. 

I've said this many times, but I am a huge an over thinker but I think one of the reasons why this time reading the poem made me reflect everything this time because of how well my thoughts in that moment in time had been put into words - especially when I've felt like I've never been able to express it in a way people can understand. I tend to overcomplicate my already complicated thoughts, but Poe phrases everything so beautifully and simply that I can't help but just think, 'woah - that really is the brain of a genius'.  In the first stanza, Poe writes some of the following lines:

'Yet if hope has flown away

In a night, or in a day, 

In a vision or in none, 

Is it therefore the less gone?'

One of the many things from these few lines from the first stanza that I really appreciate is how he has been able to portray the anxiousness an individual can feel when they start to lose hope. I found that when I start losing hope in some instances, it's not something that happens straight but gradually. As if a part of me doesn't want to give up or lose the hope because I know that a part of me can still achieve it. Which is why, for me, the line 'is it therefore the less gone' stands out. It beautifully puts the thought 'Can I' or 'Can I not' so well. As for me, as the chapter of university and just education in general slowly comes to an end I find myself questioning whether I can get through the last hurdle and what I can do once I have and I'm sure a lot of us feel the same way just in other situation, not just in the sense of education. But I feel like the closer I get to graduating, the further away this idea I had of myself in the future is and I sometimes just think 'I wish this was all just a dream.' Especially due to all the expectations everyone has and even the expectations I have for myself. 

In the poem, at the end of both stanza's Poe writes:

                                    ' All that we see or seem, (is) but a dream within a dream '

To me, by ending these stanzas with these two lines gives the impression that the reason as to why we see the world as it is - whether it's in a positive or negative light, is because the only version of the world we have seen is the one we're currently seeing and experiencing, which in a way is so limited. Maybe the reason as to why I've been questioning my future or feeling lost is because I'm so focused on and zoned in on my experiences that I'm unable to think or view every situation in another way. So I just keep going around in circles and sometimes it just doesn't seem real but more like a dream. I've always said to myself but honestly it becomes so hard  to apply it and that is to change my mindset. I feel like if I was to change my mindset then in a way everything will fall into place because my thought process won't be as rigid as it has been and everything that I see and seems might slightly adjust itself. 

There are many more things that I would love to talk about in regards to the poem and how the speakers perspective aligns so well with what my thought process but you'd be here for days reading this and this has post has already gotten so long and rambley so I'm just going to end it here (Maybe I'll post a p2). Happy belated new year! It's the year of the tiger !! As someone who's born in 1998, I'm going to use the tiger energy to motivate me, work harder, learn new things and become a better version of myself. I hope everyone is doing so well and thank you for reading this post! Having this blog really helps me realign my thoughts from time to time but seriously thank you for reading && HAPPY NEW YEAR :)

- Sweena